So there I was dressing up in a giant cartoon animal suit on the streets for a major public event.

After a few hours in the dog costume, I was getting pretty hot, so a friend and I ducked behind a parking lot on a side street so I could cool off and get some water. While I was drinking, a guy came out of the back of the bookstore we were standing beside and started unlocking his bike in front of us.

“Huh”, he said, “never seen one of you underneath the mask before.”

“Yeah, believe it or not, we’re actual humans under there”, I responded.

“It gets hot in these things,” I continued, “so I needed to step out and grab a drink. Say, I don’t suppose you know where the nearest bathroom is?”

“No, but I bet the guys over there might”, he said, gesturing at the nearby firefighters overseeing the event.

He finished unlocking his bike. As he walked away, he said over his shoulder…

“…Or you could just go find a fire hydrant.”